News Column

'True Blood' and 'Royal Pains' among this week's TV returns

June 9, 2013

YellowBrix

June 09--Jon Stewart takes a breather, ABC counts down the minutes until it runs out of "Zero Hour" episodes and "True Blood" is back. Here's what to watch and what to avoid on television this week:

Monday: "Major Crimes," 8 p.m., TNT: A member of a filmmaker's family is killed in the second-season premiere. Cut!

"The Winner Is ..." 9 p.m., NBC: ... you, if you were hoping for yet another singing competition. Nick Lachey hosts.

"King & Maxwell," 9 p.m., TNT: Rebecca Romijn and Jon Tenney are private investigators in this new buddy crime drama.

"The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," 10 p.m., Comedy Central: Correspondent John Oliver takes over the anchor desk during Jon Stewart's summer absence. This might be the best opportunity for a TV Oliver since Eddie Albert's "Green Acres" character was appointed judge of the apple contest at the county fair.

Tuesday: "Jimmy Kimmel Live: Game Night," 7 p.m., ABC: Stars of the new movie "Grown Ups 2" join the late-night host for this NBA Finals Game 3 pre-game preview (the pre-game airs at 7:30 p.m., followed by the game at 8).

"Pretty Little Liars," 7 p.m., ABC Family: Season 4 premieres.

"Twisted," 8 p.m., ABC Family: A former juvie is suspected of a classmate's murder in this series pilot.

Wednesday: "Spike Guys Choice 2013," 8 p.m., Spike: Grunt. Scratch. Repeat.

"Ghost Hunters," 8 p.m., Syfy: The team heads to an old, um, "haunt" of Elvis and Johnny Cash in tonight's summer premiere.

"Royal Pains," 8 p.m., USA: A recovering Hank returns to work in the fifth-season opener.

"Necessary Roughness," 9 p.m., USA: One of Dani's clients has a fear of flying. Funny -- when I played baseball I had a fear of flying out.

Thursday: "Sullivan & Son," 9 p.m., TBS: I never tire of sitcom plots in which women just don't "get" sports. Did I write "never?" Sorry, I meant "always."

Friday: "Magic City," 11 p.m., Starz: Ike's silent partners? Yeah, not so much. Season 2 begins tonight.

Saturday: "Zero Hour," 7 p.m., ABC: The network begins burning off episodes of this canceled and convoluted conspiracy drama.

"Redneck Island," 8 p.m., CMT: I'm not sure where this island is located, but I'll bet you have to swim through a sea of really cheap beer to reach it.

"AFI Lifetime Achievement Award," 8 p.m., TNT: The American Film Institute honors filmmaker, actor and Broadway bigwig Mel Brooks.

Sunday: "A Penguin's Life," 7 p.m., Nat Geo Wild: I'll bet those emperor penguins have an attitude.

"True Blood," 8 p.m., HBO: Season 6 begins as the governor of Louisiana declares war on vampires, which should be more effective than the war on drugs but couldn't possibly be as well plotted or ingeniously executed as the war on Christmas.

"The 2013 Miss USA Competition," 8 p.m., NBC: Yes, it's 2013 and we still gather in front of the TV to watch pretty women parade around in bathing suits and evening gowns while they field softball questions until one of them wins. Nope, it's not "The Bachelorette" -- that premiered weeks ago.

"Oprah's Master Class," 8 p.m., OWN: Motown's Berry Gordy Jr. gets detention for passing notes.

"Masterpiece Mystery!" 8 p.m., PBS: Inspector Lewis returns.

"Falling Skies," 9 p.m., TNT: Once, just once, I'd like them to write an episode about Chicken Little. Is that too much to ask?

___

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