If you look up the word "annoy" in the dictionary, you will find: "to bother or irritate; to behave in an annoying manner." There is no truth to the rumor that Kim Kardashian's photo is included with the definition - at least not in my dictionary.
The Kardashian meal ticket is a regular feature on my annual "Most Annoying Celebrities" list, and I won't keep you in suspense. She's right up at the top again. It's silly to turn this list into a dramatic countdown, where No. 1 remains a mystery until you look through the entire list. Kim Kardashian would have been the odds-on favorite to top this list even if her marriage had not ended after 72 days. The extravagant, televised wedding was annoying enough to crown the most famous of the Kardashian sisters as the most annoying celebrity of 2011.
Even the readers of Parade magazine put her at the top of its online poll a few months ago. This is one exceptionally annoying celebrity.
But she's not alone. In fact, you may be surprised to find a few of her relatives on this list, although I can assure you that Rob Kardashian is not among them. Even I have to admit that Kim's little brother has become a likable celebrity as a result of his turn on the TV show "Dancing With the Stars." I thought it was impossible to like anyone in this family until Rob came along.
Anyway, here is my list of the 10 Most Annoying Celebrities of 2011.
1. Kim Kardashian - Based on responses to previous "most annoying" lists, I feel obligated to acknowledge that Kim is a very successful businesswoman. I'm not knocking her success. I know that young girls line up breathlessly to see her, and to buy any product associated with her. But that doesn't make her any less annoying. She remains the most popular untalented person in show business.
2. Charlie Sheen - Poor Charlie. Coming from a show business family, he thought he understood show business tradition enough to know that in any public battle between pretty-boy stars and greedy producers, the pretty-boys always win. Winning. But Charlie underestimated Chuck Lorre's worth to the network (he should have checked "The Big Bang Theory's" ratings), and the actor was out, and Lorre, the creator of "Two and a Half Men," was in. Charlie tested our patience with his mindless videos.
3. Ashton Kutcher - This has nothing to do with cheating on Demi and his subsequent divorce. This has to do with him. I have finally reached the conclusion that any project is diminished by his participation in it.
4. Lindsay Lohan - What can I say about Lindsay that hasn't already been said in a probation report? Serving jail time doesn't get you admittance to a most annoying list, but trying the public's patience with endless trips to jail is an invitation to such a list. Lindsay, we're tired of your perp walk.
5. Piers Morgan - He replaced annoying-list favorite Simon Cowell because a) He's more annoying than Simon Cowell and b) Nobody cares about Simon Cowell anymore.
6. Kris Jenner - Whatever annoys you about any Kardashian is her fault.
7. Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi - I was in a bookstore last weekend, and I was at a loss to explain to my niece what is so wrong with our society that someone like Snooki has two best-selling books on the shelves.
8. Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino - Another member of the "Jersey Shore" cast. In case you didn't watch every episode this past year, the "Jersey Shore" cast members spent some time in Italy, which of course turned out to be an embarrassment to our country. The episodes were painful to watch, except for the one in which The Situation got his clock cleaned by a wall. Seriously, he's such a lunatic that when he gets angry, he throws himself into walls, and he said later that he didn't realize how sturdy the walls were in Italy. Who would question this choice for most annoying?
9. Donald Trump - Did he open his mouth in 2011? Then I'm sure he said something that was annoying. What is most annoying about Trump is that he honestly believes that he is beloved.
10. Brett Ratner - Although an annoying guy long before he was asked to produce the Oscars telecast, Ratner proved that the Academy board really is clueless. The movie producer shocked almost no one when he uttered a gay slur in a public forum, and quickly resigned his position. He was followed closely by his friend and fellow annoying celebrity, Eddie Murphy, who had agreed to host the Oscars. He wanted to work again with Ratner (they worked together on the flop "Tower Heist"), but then reverted to classic Eddie Murphy by walking out on his commitment.
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